Semper Reformanda

...some days even my lucky rocketship underpants don't help.

[Thursday, January 21, 2010]

Putting the cart before the horse

Francis Chan recently wrote an article about the role of leaders, and missteps they can take along the way. You can read the whole article here... and you should.

I wonder if the inconsistency in my walk with God has anything to do with the fact that I can lead a “successful” church in America without being in love with Jesus. I’m sure I could blame American church culture, my position, or a busy schedule for my lack of reverent intimacy. The truth, however, is that my sin and hypocrisy is a result of me.

I've been working through this topic for a long time. How do I foster and grow an authentic love for Jesus that naturally leads to devotion in prayer, reading and ministry rather than shoe-horning my devotions to foster a love for Christ? I'm in essence, putting the cart before the horse it seems. However, its been so ingrained in me that I *must* spend time in prayer or I *must* read the scriptures daily or I *must* ______________ (fill in the blank). That this life united with Christ does not look the way that others seem to see it. In fact, it changes from a full life to a mediocre job.

God speaking to the church in Ephesus says:

I know your deeds, your hard work and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked men, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken your first love. (Revelation 2:2-4)

God recognizes their good works, but that doesn't stop him from letting them know that they are forsaking him. He even calls them to repent or else!

My takeaway here is that Tim Bounds was right (he always is... the sooner you recognize that, the easier it will get). Tim, in reference to my driving, said I was "a bit oblivious to my surroundings." Now, I feel that DEFINITELY applies to my driving, but it also applies to my spirituality. Why don't I feel like I'm in love with God? Why do I feel like this is more of a chore than a pleasure? Looking at it through this lens seems to display that it's because I'm oblivious to the work that God is doing and has done in me. I'm oblivious to the fact that I am a unique creation, designed for a specific divine purpose. Though I'm reminded weekly of these truths, I forget. I forget to love God.

God, I pray now that you would awaken me to your movements. Ignite in me a desire for you that is reflective of what you have already done for me. God, may I never forget to love you. I pray that you would break down my feeble thoughts and attitudes and replace them with your thoughts and your attitudes. God, please fill me with an authentic love for you and your creation.


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